Roller coaster of emotion

Honestly, I don't know how to write anymore and I don't have words to explain these days. It's been a long time I didn't  find my everyday. I have been working too much for a month and I can say it too much only for something that I do not enjoy retirely. 

I  didn't find the excitement doing this work. I don't update my blog with a new post because there is no reason to write things when I myself feel not inspired at all. This month is running far from what I have planned before. I was perfectly messed up. 

Here's the mess, I started to take a responsibility of a charity project, something I haven't done in my entire life. It's really hard to work with uninspiring people. This project requires every member's cooperation. At least try to cooperate with me especially when it comes to doing a report or proposal. Don't expect me to do all the work. The days were fairly, socially exhausting.  As well as physical. 

I was faintly distracted. Getting the proposal and report done in a rush, I couldn't get my head be focus in 2 contrast of work. This is the problem of someone who have an average brain like me. It was tiring, really :') I was like dying and coming back to life. 

I wish to have quite long holiday after this.... I feel so messed running through this burden tasks which only make me crazy for mumbling and even somehow..crying...when everything aren't going as well as I expected, it will ruin all my day. Thanks to Allah, I still could do my job and work toward all inspiration in my head.. just I always so lengthy like usual.

Some of the days, we must try to do the things that we think we can't do. It would be more than worthed. My time spent with a month of sleepless night. 3 or 4 hours sleeping.. like dead...Sometimes we must across those hard feeling to fulfill our dream. 

I've deal with my mind finally. I feel so relieved... 

what a roller coaster of emotion..

I got reminded two of unforgettable proverb that has changed my life.. 

“To get something you never had, you have to do something you never did.”

"Choose a job you love, and you will never have to work a day in your life"

Thank you Allah, today all are getting better. 

A person tired and fed up of life asked God, “Why so many Mountains and Hills to climb in life?” And God replied “to enable you to have a better view of life”