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Showing posts from May, 2019

Roller coaster of emotion

Honestly, I don't know how to write anymore and I don't have words to explain these days. It's been a long time I didn't  find my everyday. I have been working too much for a month and I can say it too much only for something that I do not enjoy retirely.  I  didn't find the excitement doing this work. I don't update my blog with a new post because there is no reason to write things when I myself feel not inspired at all. This month is running far from what I have planned before. I was perfectly messed up.  Here's the mess, I started to take a responsibility of a charity project, something I haven't done in my entire life. It's really hard to work with uninspiring people. This project requires every member's cooperation. At least try to cooperate with me especially when it comes to doing a report or proposal. Don't expect me to do all the work. The days were fairly, socially exhausting.  As well as physical.  I was faintly distra

When I am silent, I have thunder hidden inside

My silence means I am tired of fighting and now there is nothing left to fight for. My silence means I'm tired of explaining my feeling. Now, I don't have energy to explain them anymore.  I have adapted to the changes in my life and don't want to complain. I am on a self healing process and I am trying to forget everything. i'm just trying to move on gracefully with all my dignity from  unnecessary drama.  I act like I don't care. Like nothing can hurt me. I put up a big wall of toughness and pretend that everything is fine. I don't need somebody's "affection" but in reality i think I'm just too scared. Scared not being good enough, scared of getting hurt, scared to let somebody in. Aku memilih untuk mendiamkan diri and let it go but when I've reached my limit, I don't even care anymore. I like to be silence and prefer to be alone.  Sometimes silence can hold more meaning than words. I'm still learning the art of not replyi

Storms don't last forever

It's a difficult times for me these days. I think I probably can get through it. But I will make it through and grow into a better person. At the beginning it felt like this would be death. If i had free time, I prefer to sleep rather than dating or even have a nice tea talk with my friends. I know what should i do in this kind of situation.... Forget, and move on. When you let it go, you create space for something better. You can't change what has already happened. Don't waste your time thinking about it. I was the one trying to make things work  even not everything went smoothly lately.  Just accepted what happen and continue living. Within 10 years, your life is gonna be awesome. Susah sekarang, Nanti senang la ;) 

Kindness is free

“KINDNESS IS FREE TO GIVE, BUT PRICELESS TO RECEIVE.” Satu benda yang aku belajar dari kehidupan, kebaikan yang kita buat untuk orang lain, belum tentu dibalas dengan kebaikan dari orang tersebut. Kebaikan itu mungkin datang dari orang yang kita tak kenal dan mungkin dari seseorang yang pernah kita beranggapan buruk. Ingat tujuan utama kita adalah akhirat bukan dunia.  Teruskan berbuat baik, kita tidak tahu kebaikan mana yang diterima oleh Allah SWT. Kita tidak tahu kebaikan mana yang dapat menyentuh hati orang lain. Pandangan orang berbeza-beza. Jika kita punya niat yang baik, Allah akan selalu mempermudahkan segala urusan kita. Tak ada satu kebaikan yang sia-sia.  Setiap kebaikan yang kita buat memberi impak yang positif untuk diri sendiri. If you can't afford to do the great things, just do the small things in a great way.  Just be an example, show kindness to bad people. Forgive people who don't deserve it. Your actions always reflect who you are. I've been s